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Belle looks traditionally Thai — petite and tan-skinned.She thinks that her appearance doesn’t live up to society’s definition of beauty, making it even more difficult for her to date. The fact that I realize this makes me limit myself from going after someone,” she said.But although farangs have a broader interpretation of beauty, Bangkok women face another dilemma — the “sweet Thai girlfriend” stereotype.When they date Westerners, they often find the men treat Thai women far differently than they would women in their home countries.Because of this, Thais may approach relationships more seriously than Westerners, who are comfortable chatting up complete strangers as well as with the phenomena of “friends with benefits,” “seeing each other,” and “not labeling things.” It might be due to this that most Bangkok women find themselves dating the people they come across in their social circle — and only those of the same or higher social class to boot.Call it having standards, call it ticking off a checklist, but they tend to go out with someone they already know to have the qualities they want, rather than “wasting time” learning about a complete stranger.
While it has been written countless times that expat women in Bangkok have it hard when it comes to dating (and we’ll be hitting that topic ourselves in just a couple of weeks), when you look around, plenty of lovely, single Thai women don’t seem to be doing any better.
“I texted my friend the first day I saw him in class that I liked this guy, but I didn’t even think about speaking to him until he asked me out,” Ying said.
“It’s not that I try to be a traditional Thai lady.
So, while chatting and giggling to friends about guys you like may be hilarious, the sad truth is that many Thai women seem to put themselves in the relatively hopeless position of playing the waiting game — just praying that the men they like will like them back and take the initiative.
Comic strip “honesty sandwich,” by young Thai female artist Tuna Dunn, hilariously illustrates what it’s like to be a Thai woman, who hopes for a sign about a guy rather than confess her attraction to him.